Thursday, February 01, 2007

an open letter to customer service reps

if you are a customer service representative and you ever get me on the phone, please, i beg of you, do not call me "hun." or "sweetie." or any other term that makes me feel like an 8-year-old.

actually, unless you are my husband or a very close friend, please do not use any sort of term of endearment whatsoever. i am NOT endeared to you.

i may sound like a teenager on the phone (and look like one in person...), but i assure you that i am a grown adult.

i am not "playing wife." the account i'm calling about is real.

and especially, ESPECIALLY, if you can't give me any information because my husband's is the only name on the account, ESPECIALLY then i am NOT AT ALL endeared to you.

never mind the fact that i can spout off his social and date of birth faster than i can my own (when people ask me for mine, i have to think a minute- his comes to mind first these days).

unless you want me to start paying my bills with pretend money, please start treating me like an adult.


Jesse said...

Aww, really? I kind of like it when they use terms of endearment. Makes me feel loved. :)

earl of lennox said...

Now sweeetiiie. It sounds like you may just be a bit upset. Am I right Hun? Just take a big breath with me, ok? Its goin' be awright, you hear little sweetie? You don't need to get all upset and that. Now, where were we Hun? Oh, yes, you were giving me that social security number again. Now, I know you're a yankee and all, but if you could just slow down a little sweetie, we might just be able to carry on a decent conversation here. Let's start again, now, what did you say your name was again Hun?

David said...

That made me laugh.

Indeed it did.

But fear not, little one. You'll have your place in the grown-up world soon enough.

P.S. This is, in fact, the one and only (arguably a good thing)David Garner.