Thursday, October 11, 2007

Weekends and What Not to Say

Sorry it's been a while. We've been busy, but nothing blogworthy (as my last post demonstrates). Well, by "busy" I mean Jon had a 4-day weekend last weekend... gotta love Federal holidays (Christopher Columbus Day? Who knew?) We enjoyed it, as it was- quite literally- the last weekend we have until December 15/16. Not even kidding. I don't mean that, like, we have plans on Saturday evening or anything- I mean for the next NINE weekends we have WEEKEND plans away from home. Then, we have a couple weeks to rest (during Christmas), followed by a birth, him changing jobs, and moving. Oh, hopefully in that time we'll also sell the house, which means we'll also be packing and finding a place to live. Nice.

Now that you feel sufficiently bad for me, moving on...

On Thursday we went to UMT (Unit Ministry Team) Training at a local mega-church. There were some things we gleaned, and some things we weren't exactly impressed with.

Based on that experience (and others), let me just say this- if you're not military, no one expects you to be military. If you can understand that, we all will be happier.

The fact is, no one knows exactly how to act around military- especially wives whose husbands are deployed. And the fact is, I'm not sure what to tell you- everyone wants to be treated differently.

Here's a couple general rules of thumb, though:

~ Don't act like you know what it's like, unless you do. (I'm sorry, but your husband's 10-day camping trip in Canada just isn't the same thing...)

~ Ask questions. Again, we don't expect you to know what it's like- so if we start talking in military lingo, ask what in the world we are saying!!

~ Accept our emotions. Yes, we knew what we were signing up for... that doesn't mean we LIKE deployments (or extensions), constant moves, or "The Army Way" about everything. There are bad things about the Army, just like there are about your job... we don't have to take those things with a smile. Saying, "Well, you knew this before..." doesn't bring my husband home, and it doesn't make it any easier.

~ Acknowledge that there is more to life than the Army. Just because my husband might be deployed (or is out in the field, or even simply wears ACUs to work every day), that doesn't mean I can't have a life and interests outside the Army. Normal just looks different, that's all.

Again, these are general rules. If you're in the military or a spouse and would like to add to this in the comments section, please feel free!

Basically, just as in anything, act in love and respect, and itsallgood...

Just a disclaimer: If this post seems disjointed, it's because I have written it over the past 4 days...

1 comment:

Amy Maxwell said...

"I'm sorry, but your husband's 10-day camping trip in Canada just isn't the same thing..."

:) Thank you, Sara.

Looking forward to meeting you.